More Than Beautiful

More Than Beautiful

This was how he “labelled” me, at least in this picture!

Now? I am not so sure?

I think he still feels this way but is too lost in pain, hurt, confusion, living to ever admit this to me.

I was happy then. He was happy then.
I am not happy now. He is not happy now.
I still love him. He still loves me.
Can we rekindle what was once there? Or do we have to move forward only remembering what we once shared?

Good times are a great way to mask the hurt and pain you feel inside.

You wouldn’t know it from this picture, but I was deeply depressed. He made me smile. His essence and relentless care and concern for me kept me afloat.

Today his relentless hard outer shell, cold mean demeanor now sinks me down and now allows for my depression to show.

I try to hide it from you, sometimes I get away with it, other times I don’t. But that is OK. Because that is called living.

I love me. I love him.
I am hurting. I am lonely. I am full of determination. I am optimistic. I am positive, only when I am awake. I am More Than Beautiful.

He was right when he labelled this picture as that.

I thank you Mr. B. for that. I appreciate your insight, both then and now.

Mr B. I may be More Than Beautiful however. You are More of a Man Today Than You Think You Are.

I’m hungry and I love you.


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